This post is all about funny self love quotes.
Self-love is one of those things that I hoped would just happen as I got older. Instead, I’ve realized it’s something that I really need to practice over and over again.
For example – oftentimes in life, you’ll make a mistake, and if you don’t show yourself compassion and love, you could find yourself beating yourself up for that same mistake over and over again.
When that happens, it can be so hard to be happy.
So instead, it’s so important to not blow it out of proportion, and just say “okay, that kind of sucked. But now I know what NOT to do next time.”
Life is full of moments like that.
It can also be really hard to accept ALL parts of yourself. You may have regrets. You may have features or characteristics that you don’t particularly care for, but that you can’t change.
Are you really going to live your whole life wishing you were different? Or are you going to embrace who you are?
The latter is the way to self-love. Learning to love even the parts of you that you wish you could change. I have a few of those 🙂 And guess what? We all do. No human is immune.
Now, it’s up to you to decide how you want to live. Do you want to practice self-love, or the opposite? I know what I’m gonna choose! Even when it can be so hard. Even when it can feel impossible. How about you?
But hey, enough of the heavy stuff! This post is supposed to be funny! 😛
So, here are the absolutely funniest quotes about self-love. I had a great time writing this post because of all the funny stuff I read, so I KNOW you will like it, too.
Just remember that no matter what you are going through or how you feel about yourself, you are absolutely not alone, and you deserve to be loved by others, but most importantly by yourself!
Funny Self Love Quotes That’ll Make You LOL
The Best Funny Self-Love Quotes
You are going to absolutely love these funny quotes about self-love. Even if you think self-love is a bit silly, these quotes are sure to make you smile!
1. “The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.” – Lucille Ball
2. “All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.” – Charles M. Schulz
3. “Sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.” – Harvey Specter
4. “If someone says you’re weird, say ‘thank you.’” – Ellen DeGeneres
5. “The older you get, the better you get. Unless you’re a banana.” – Betty White
6. “I am the only person in the world I should like to know thoroughly.” – Oscar Wilde
7. “Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the ‘Titanic’ who waved off the dessert cart.” – Erma Bombeck
8. “My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She’s ninety-seven now, and we don’t know where the hell she is.” – Ellen Degeneres
9. “The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don’t want, drink what you don’t like, and do what you’d rather not.” – Mark Twain
10. “Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body.” – George Carlin
11. “Don’t stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.” – George Burns
12. “If you end up with a boring miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your teacher, your priest, or some guy on the television telling you how to do your shit, then you deserve it.” – Frank Zappa
13. “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.” – Mark Twain
14. “I had plastic surgery last week – I cut up my credit cards.” – Henny Youngman
15. “Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.” – Margaret Mead
16. “Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.” – Charles M. Schulz
17. “I’m not crazy — I’ve just been in a very bad mood for 40 years.” – Ouiser Boudreaux, Steel Magnolias
More Funny Self-Love Quotes
The best way to learn a little bit more about self-love is to learn about it through the experiences of others.
Read these hilarious self-love quotes if you want to see how other people practice self-love!
18. “Why be tall when you can be small and perfectly crafted for fun and adventure?” – Unknown
19. “I always cook with wine. Sometimes I even add it to the food.” – W.C. Fields
20. “Everything is funny, as long as it’s happening to somebody else.” – Will Rogers
21. “I have a lot of growing up to do. I realized that the other day inside my fort.” – Zach Galifianakis
22. “If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?” – Abraham Lincoln
23. “I just want to lie on the beach and eat hot dogs. That’s all I’ve ever wanted.” – Kevin Malone, The Office
24. “A smile is a facelift that’s in everyone’s price range!” – Tom Wilson
25. “My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine.” – Carolina Rhea
26. ”Whenever I’m about to do something, I think, ‘Would an idiot do that?’ And if they would, I do not do that thing.” – Dwight Schrute, The Office
27. “I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.” – Charles Lamb
28. “I like my money where I can see it: hanging in my closet.” —Carrie Bradshaw, Sex and the City
29. “What the world needs is more geniuses with humility; there are so few of us left.” – Oscar Levant
30. “There is no sunrise so beautiful that it is worth waking me up to see it.” – Mindy Kaling
31. ”My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don’t really know me.” – Garry Shandling
32. “I don’t care what they say about me. I just want to eat.” – Pam Beesly, The Office
Even More Humorous Self Love Quotes
You may not think quotes could actually hit your funny bone, but I bet you’ll be surprised with these ones. If none of these cause you to crack a smile, I’d be SHOCKED!
33. “I’ve had great success being a total idiot.” – Jerry Lewis
34. “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.” – Jim Henson
35. “Self-love is a good thing but self-awareness is more important. You need to once in a while go ‘Uh, I’m kind of an a******.” – Louis C.K.
36. All the things I like to do are either immoral, illegal, or fattening.” – Alexander Woollcott
37. “The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.” – George Carlin
38. “Yes I am weird, weird is good. Normal is overrated.” – Mad-D
39. “Suffering is part of our training program for becoming wise.” – Ram Dass
40. “I don’t like myself. I’m crazy about myself.” – May West
41. “Life is like a sewer… what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.” – Unknown
42. “I used to just crastinate, but I got so good, I went pro.” – Unknown
43. “I don’t wear the opinions of others anymore. I learned to dress myself.” – Nikki Rowe
44. “Whatever paths you choose, someone will hate you. Only be certain that someone is not you.” – S.D. Simper
45. “Why are you trying so hard to fit in when you were born to stand out?” – Ian Wallace
46. “The bags under my eyes are Prada.” – Unknown
47. “Too glam to give a damn.” – Unknown
Inspirational Quotes About Self Love
When it comes to self-love, you truly have to be your own best friend. The following people have found ways to make themselves their own best friend, and I think they will inspire you to do the same!
48. “Be enough for yourself first. The rest of the world can wait.” – F.W.
49. “When I hear somebody sigh, “Life is hard”, I am always tempted to ask, “Compared to what?”” – Sydney Harris
50. “If you don’t have wrinkles, you haven’t laughed enough.” – Phyllis Diller
51. “They say self-care is the greatest middle-finger of all time. We should all make use of it more often.” – Adelina Vasile
52. “You don’t need support to succeed. Some of the greatest achievements were made by people who had faith in their vision, belief in themselves, and the guts to go it alone.” – Rigel J. Dawson
53. “Don’t forget to drink some water and get some sun. You’re basically a house plant with more complicated emotions.” – Pearl Haggard
54. “It’s important in life if you don’t give a shit. It can help you a lot.” – George Carlin
55. “Bad decisions make good stories.” – Ellis Vidler
56. “Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor.” – Truman Capote
57. “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.” – W.C. Fields
58. “I don’t trust anyone who doesn’t laugh” – Maya Angelou
59. “Don’t get bitter, get better.” – Alyssa Edwards
60. “They say nobody’s perfect. Guess what? I’m nobody.” – Unknown
61. “I’m staying home today. I have mood poisoning.” – Unknown
62. “I have become my own version of an optimist. If I can’t make it through one door, I’ll go through another door or I’ll make a door. Something terrific will come no matter how dark the present.” – Joan Rivers
63. “I was once afraid of people saying, ‘Who does she think she is?’ Now I have the courage to stand and say, ‘This is who I am.’” – Oprah Winfrey
64. “The only person who can pull me down is myself, and I’m not going to let myself pull me down anymore.” – C. JoyBell C.
Motivational Quotes About Self Love
If you are the kind of person who loves motivational quotes, this section about self-love is for you. It can be hard to carve out time for self-love, but these quotes will definitely motivate you to practice it.
65. “Don’t doubt yourself. That’s what haters are for.” – Turcois Ominek
66. “Whatever you do, always give 100%. Unless you’re donating blood.” – Bill Murray
67. “The elevator to success is out of order. You’ll have to use the stairs, one step at a time.” – Joe Girard
68. “When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.” – Cathy Guisewite
69. “I sometimes give myself admirable advice, but I am incapable of taking it.” – Mary Wortley Montagu
70. “When I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead.” – Barney Stinson
71. “Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer.” – Ellen DeGeneres
72. “I am a queen because I know how to govern myself.” – Lailah Gifty Akita
73. “If it costs you your peace of mind, you’ve overpaid.” – Rigel J. Dawson
74. “‘Are you free tomorrow?’ ‘No, I’m expensive.’” – Rebel Circus
75. “Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” – George Bernard Shaw
76. “When you realize your self-worth you’ll stop giving people discounts.” – Unknown
77. “I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying.” – Oscar Wilde
78. “People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.” – A. A. milne
79. “This is my cup of care. Oh, look, it’s empty.” – Unknown
80. “Do no harm. Take no shit.” – Unknown
Funny Self-Care Quotes That’ll Make You Laugh
If you are looking for a good laugh paired with incredibly wise self care quotes, you’re in the right place. These funny quotes about self-love are oftentimes the best medicine if you’re struggling to love yourself!
81. “They say good things take time, that’s why I’m always late.” – Unknown
82. “Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.” – Erma Bombeck
83. “Even I don’t wake up looking like Cindy Crawford.” – Cindy Crawford
84. “I am not an early bird or night owl; I’m some sort of permanently exhausted pigeon.” – Unknown
85. “People say, ‘How you stay looking so young?’ I say, well, good lighting, good doctors, and good makeup.” – Dolly Parton
86. “Everyone has a purpose in life. Perhaps yours is watching television.” – David Letterman
87. “Look, you didn’t ask me for my opinion, but I’m old, so I’m giving it anyway.” – Sophia Petrillo, The Golden Girls
88. “I am going to self-care myself right to my bed and take a nap.” – Unknown
89. “Resting is a part of the process, even if it’s not a part of the plan.” – Carley Schweet
90. “No matter how bad things get, remember these sage words: You’re old, you sag, get over it.” – Sophia Petrillo, The Golden Girls
91. “Self-care is the greatest middle finger of all time.” – Unknown
92. “Age is something that doesn’t matter unless you are a cheese.” – Luis Buñuel
93. “RIP to all the time I spent giving AF.” – Unknown
94. “As you get older, three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can’t remember the other two.” – Sir Norman Wisdom
95. “I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.” – Lily Tomlin
Humorous Self-Love Quotes By Famous People
It’s amazing how many people have so much wisdom when it comes to self-love. It just goes to show that the journey to self-love is one that many people are on.
96. “All of a sudden it hit me, I realized what the problem is: I can’t be with someone like me. I hate myself! If anything, I need to get the exact opposite of me. ” – Jerry Seinfeld
97. “I’ve had great success being a total idiot. ” – Jerry Lewis
98. “Do things that make you happy within the confines of the legal system.” – Ellen DeGeneres
99. “My tastes are simple: I am easily satisfied with the best.” – Winston S. Churchill
100. “Do your thing and don’t care if they like it.” – Tina Fey
101. “I don’t trust anyone who hasn’t been self-destructive in some way, and who hasn’t gone through some sort of bout of self-loathing. You’ve got to bang yourself around a bit to know yourself.” – Johnny Depp
102. “Weak people revenge. Strong people forgive. Intelligent People Ignore.” – Albert Einstein
103. “He that falls in love with himself will have no rivals.” – Benjamin Franklin
104. “Be yourself. No one can say you’re doing it wrong.” – Charles M. Schulz
105. “The beauty of a woman is not in a facial mode but the true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul.” – Audrey Hepburn
106. “A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it’s in hot water.” – Eleanor Roosevelt
107. “I don’t want to be a supermodel; I want to be a role model.” – Queen Latifah
108. “Whether you think you can or whether you think you can’t, you’re right.” – Henry Ford
109. “It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.” – Andre Gide
I hope these self love quotes gave you a laugh and reminded you to love yourself just a little bit more!
This post was all about funny self love quotes.
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